And as I watch events unfold in front of my eyes like a string of silent clips, the whispered words of yes no maybe I think I love her but I don't and life would be less painful if it'd end, I take a step back as an observer and muse- no, I'm not an observer, I can't be neutral, I can't can't can't but there isn't anything I can do.
With the way things are playing out in the story of my life, I'd rather meet writer's block again, feel its pressure press against my lips to prevent the words from flowing. But is that all I can do? No, I can rewrite things; make it so that spangled banners of happiness dance from the walls, cheer and laughter ring through the alleyways of bliss and fear. 45, 45, 45;; perfection found within the realm of numbers, perfection so intangible that few can even vie to seek?
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Friday, January 30, 2009
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
and i don't know i don't care i'm going downhill fuck fuck fuck this shit i say fuck fuck fuck FUCK! fuck you, fuck this, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck so much i don't know why or what i'm fucking, there isn't no love all you can see is the word FUCK plastered over your face in red, stab stab stab stab stab stab isn't it all trivial, isn't this all some sort of joke? ironic laugh. ironic smile. irony irony irony-
reds purples black, reds purples black. pound pound hammer hammer pound pound pound, bash bash bash ohmygod what's wrong with you bitch, stop pounding yourself into the grave you've dug when there isn't any self to maul. you aren't a you, you aren't a me, you're a bitch bitch bitch senseless bitch cow, dead bitch cow.
breathless senseless wind-flying-in-face madness pattering drops of icicles not snow sun screaming heart wrenching gut churning NO! you're lost in the vortex that you've crafted, angels ripping your lungs out so that you can't breathe. blood isn't red, isn't blue, it's orange which is a mockery because isn't it what you love? but no you're orange because you can't be defined, can't be fitted into the slots of either yellow or red, good or bad. and there you'll drift, drifting into forever, pushed away by both heaven and hell-
(because only time will tell)
reds purples black, reds purples black. pound pound hammer hammer pound pound pound, bash bash bash ohmygod what's wrong with you bitch, stop pounding yourself into the grave you've dug when there isn't any self to maul. you aren't a you, you aren't a me, you're a bitch bitch bitch senseless bitch cow, dead bitch cow.
breathless senseless wind-flying-in-face madness pattering drops of icicles not snow sun screaming heart wrenching gut churning NO! you're lost in the vortex that you've crafted, angels ripping your lungs out so that you can't breathe. blood isn't red, isn't blue, it's orange which is a mockery because isn't it what you love? but no you're orange because you can't be defined, can't be fitted into the slots of either yellow or red, good or bad. and there you'll drift, drifting into forever, pushed away by both heaven and hell-
(because only time will tell)
I hate waking up in the middle of the night crying about things you can't change, and wanting to turn back time so that you're happy, happy in a place that you'll never be able to return to and with people that you're never going to ever see-
(Yeah I burst out crying, and for reasons more pathetic than ever)
(Yeah I burst out crying, and for reasons more pathetic than ever)
Friday, January 23, 2009
I'm not going to lie and say that we've been pink bubblegum crossed with stars, sweet blueberries with cream, or even spangled confetti on icing of the cake; because it's ashes now, what we might once have had, ashes tossed into the sea under bitter prayers and the curse that wishes don't come true. We were living a lie, me and you, and it's time for us to bury it under a gray slab, a monument erected as a testament to the tangles in our ropes and the deceit we chewed our way out of.
Shackles to shackles, lust to dust. I could gaze into your eyes forever but forever isn't real, and it's just a matter of time till everything shatters the urn I sealed you away in. The image of a desecration, the sacrilege of hope, entwining together and falling apart
(like the fragments of my heart)
------------------------
P.S: I have no idea what this is about.
Shackles to shackles, lust to dust. I could gaze into your eyes forever but forever isn't real, and it's just a matter of time till everything shatters the urn I sealed you away in. The image of a desecration, the sacrilege of hope, entwining together and falling apart
(like the fragments of my heart)
------------------------
P.S: I have no idea what this is about.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Mocks report:
Everything was at least my minimum possible grade (without me going to drown myself in the river of Ego) so I am happy- well, except for Chem, but I'm hoping that the grade boundaries will be low enough that I can scrounge for marks and pull it up to my minimum possible grade.
Other grades are all fine, or beyond fine. I personally am over the moon about English and Mandarin, but I shouldn't get too arrogant, should I? Sigh, it's back to the grindstone in a short while, but before we know it the spectre of IB exams will all be OVER.
OVER.
By the way, how many of you like writing, randomness, stories with no plot, and VERY RETARDED TEACHERS? If you do just tell me here or MSN and I'll show you something. It's not very interesting yet, but the more people that join, the more fun it's going to get.
*N.B: Not recommended if you are too normal*
Everything was at least my minimum possible grade (without me going to drown myself in the river of Ego) so I am happy- well, except for Chem, but I'm hoping that the grade boundaries will be low enough that I can scrounge for marks and pull it up to my minimum possible grade.
Other grades are all fine, or beyond fine. I personally am over the moon about English and Mandarin, but I shouldn't get too arrogant, should I? Sigh, it's back to the grindstone in a short while, but before we know it the spectre of IB exams will all be OVER.
OVER.
By the way, how many of you like writing, randomness, stories with no plot, and VERY RETARDED TEACHERS? If you do just tell me here or MSN and I'll show you something. It's not very interesting yet, but the more people that join, the more fun it's going to get.
*N.B: Not recommended if you are too normal*
Friday, January 16, 2009
You know, I suppose that in time people leave us, things change, and everything you once knew is shaken. I've learned that the hard way, with me being the one leaving at the end of Form 3, then Uplands in Year 11, and then CamTrad where I bawled my eyes out and hugged everyone to death, because I didn't think I'd see anyone again- I don't think I've ever cried so much in such a short time period, save for the time when my grandfather died.
((see, i've never been good at [coping with forever]))
But that isn't the point. The point is, after school today, I went home, played tennis, then had Li Yun and Xiang Yih (who I haven't seen since forever) come over to my house to finish my gift to Jianing. Played a little Guitar Hero, then tried to paste everything together while we rushed around trying to get a printer because mine was broken, pasting together the pieces of the puzzle we've been living in for years.
I'm not going to post pictures of it here, or let any of you know what was in the scrapbook and shoebox we decorated and hand-made for her, because it's between the people that made it, and Natassha (Choong) who we saw at dinner and who said that she would send her gigolos to Jianing if she became too- To use a politcally correct term, non-Chinese. XD. But, well, some of the things I said in that book were personal, and when she started reading it out I had to tell her to stop. Whatever it is, I think she liked it. And I'm happy.
And I know I'm going to miss her.
Thing is, when people I went to school with have left before, I was never really that close to any of them- oh fine, I was close to them, but not in the heart-wrenching-bloond-bonding kind of way I'm close to friends like Jianing and Li Yun and Shu Lin, not in the kind of way where if they stepped out of my life, there'd be a certain void- not a difference, but a type of emptiness inside me (and) I don't know what I'd do to replace it.
There, I've admitted it. I rely on my friends. For the past nine years or so, I've been good friends with this girl. From the days where I'd still climb into the closet so I didn't have to face my fears, the days where we sat next to each other in English class and were always told to shut up, that one big fight in Form 3 which got blown out of proportion for childish reasons, to the time when we called each other just to scream, to the times after we made up and things were still awkward, to late-night phone calls that made things seem like the fight never happened, to the trip to KL where we recorded songs and ate soba. We've shared laughter, tears, cookies, and a bed- and we have so many in-jokes with Li Yun that when the three of us talk, we're the only ones that ever find it funny.
23.
Nobody else even cracked a smile, did they?
I grow attached to people too easily. I have a problem with that. I care about people- even those that I haven't known for long- I can care so much sometimes that it starts to hurt. I don't know. And for someone that I've known that long- I know it's not forever, but it's going to be weird looking at the phone and wondering why I can't call her anymore, looking at time zones so that I'll know when I can go on Skype, signing on to MSN just before school when I check my e-mails so I can say hi. SOBA isn't going to be the same, is it? Li Yun and I were on the phone, and it hit us- at the same time- that it was going to be like that from then on, just her and me and Shin Dee and the others but ultimately, some of us won't be there anymore.
I don't know how I feel. Sad, somewhat. Happy that she'll be having a great time in Canada. Somewhat shocked. But I haven't cried. I promised myself I wouldn't cry about people leaving, not ever again. It isn't forever. I can't cope with forever, but a few months will be fine.
(Damn- if this is what Jianing leaving is like, I wonder what Shu Lin leaving will be?)
It's not forever. It's not going to be that bad. I know I'll miss her, but it's just missing someone. I know I have other friends that love me.
So why do I feel somewhat empty?
Would it be too clingy, if I actually started to cry? I promised myself that I wouldn't but I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know.
((see, i've never been good at [coping with forever]))
But that isn't the point. The point is, after school today, I went home, played tennis, then had Li Yun and Xiang Yih (who I haven't seen since forever) come over to my house to finish my gift to Jianing. Played a little Guitar Hero, then tried to paste everything together while we rushed around trying to get a printer because mine was broken, pasting together the pieces of the puzzle we've been living in for years.
I'm not going to post pictures of it here, or let any of you know what was in the scrapbook and shoebox we decorated and hand-made for her, because it's between the people that made it, and Natassha (Choong) who we saw at dinner and who said that she would send her gigolos to Jianing if she became too- To use a politcally correct term, non-Chinese. XD. But, well, some of the things I said in that book were personal, and when she started reading it out I had to tell her to stop. Whatever it is, I think she liked it. And I'm happy.
And I know I'm going to miss her.
Thing is, when people I went to school with have left before, I was never really that close to any of them- oh fine, I was close to them, but not in the heart-wrenching-bloond-bonding kind of way I'm close to friends like Jianing and Li Yun and Shu Lin, not in the kind of way where if they stepped out of my life, there'd be a certain void- not a difference, but a type of emptiness inside me (and) I don't know what I'd do to replace it.
There, I've admitted it. I rely on my friends. For the past nine years or so, I've been good friends with this girl. From the days where I'd still climb into the closet so I didn't have to face my fears, the days where we sat next to each other in English class and were always told to shut up, that one big fight in Form 3 which got blown out of proportion for childish reasons, to the time when we called each other just to scream, to the times after we made up and things were still awkward, to late-night phone calls that made things seem like the fight never happened, to the trip to KL where we recorded songs and ate soba. We've shared laughter, tears, cookies, and a bed- and we have so many in-jokes with Li Yun that when the three of us talk, we're the only ones that ever find it funny.
23.
Nobody else even cracked a smile, did they?
I grow attached to people too easily. I have a problem with that. I care about people- even those that I haven't known for long- I can care so much sometimes that it starts to hurt. I don't know. And for someone that I've known that long- I know it's not forever, but it's going to be weird looking at the phone and wondering why I can't call her anymore, looking at time zones so that I'll know when I can go on Skype, signing on to MSN just before school when I check my e-mails so I can say hi. SOBA isn't going to be the same, is it? Li Yun and I were on the phone, and it hit us- at the same time- that it was going to be like that from then on, just her and me and Shin Dee and the others but ultimately, some of us won't be there anymore.
I don't know how I feel. Sad, somewhat. Happy that she'll be having a great time in Canada. Somewhat shocked. But I haven't cried. I promised myself I wouldn't cry about people leaving, not ever again. It isn't forever. I can't cope with forever, but a few months will be fine.
(Damn- if this is what Jianing leaving is like, I wonder what Shu Lin leaving will be?)
It's not forever. It's not going to be that bad. I know I'll miss her, but it's just missing someone. I know I have other friends that love me.
So why do I feel somewhat empty?
Would it be too clingy, if I actually started to cry? I promised myself that I wouldn't but I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Maid generator thing... YEAH.
Your name is Ethie [short for ethereally. haha]. You are 18 years old. You have black eyes and transparent hair, and wear a white maid uniform. You are cool and heroic; others describe you as single-minded, doll-like and unflappable.
You are obsessed with cleanliness, and can't let the tiniest bit of dirt go unnoticed. For whatever reason, you are responsible for the death of your parents. You look up to one of the other characters as your mentor. You wear glasses; you can't use contact lenses, but at least they compliment your maid uniform. You are an alien who came to this world from somewhere in outer space.
You are a slave, and have no choice about your line of work. In combat, you wield a scythe worthy of the grim reaper. When you are extremely upset, you spend all day sleeping. Due to your notable Skill, you have the ability Lock Picking. You can enter any room whenever you feel like. This works even when someone is using World for Two.
... What the heck is THIS?!
Your name is Ethie [short for ethereally. haha]. You are 18 years old. You have black eyes and transparent hair, and wear a white maid uniform. You are cool and heroic; others describe you as single-minded, doll-like and unflappable.
You are obsessed with cleanliness, and can't let the tiniest bit of dirt go unnoticed. For whatever reason, you are responsible for the death of your parents. You look up to one of the other characters as your mentor. You wear glasses; you can't use contact lenses, but at least they compliment your maid uniform. You are an alien who came to this world from somewhere in outer space.
You are a slave, and have no choice about your line of work. In combat, you wield a scythe worthy of the grim reaper. When you are extremely upset, you spend all day sleeping. Due to your notable Skill, you have the ability Lock Picking. You can enter any room whenever you feel like. This works even when someone is using World for Two.
... What the heck is THIS?!
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
1. Take a picture of yourself right now
2. Don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair...just take a picture...
3. Post the photo with no EDITING
4. Post this instruction with your photo
5. Tag 5 people to do this
Tagged by Jasryn. I seem to be doing a lot of tags today. (:
See this picture of me? It's called being in my nightie even though it's only 6 in the evening, having hair that's messy because you just washed your face and that's why the ends are damp while the rest of your head is dry.
This is called being plain retarded.
I'd tag Shu Lin my best-friend-cum-wife if she had a blog but NOOOO SHE DOESN'T. So I tag:
1) Amy
2) Sarah SC
3) Darren
4) Priscilla
5) Sara Loh
2. Don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair...just take a picture...
3. Post the photo with no EDITING
4. Post this instruction with your photo
5. Tag 5 people to do this
Tagged by Jasryn. I seem to be doing a lot of tags today. (:
See this picture of me? It's called being in my nightie even though it's only 6 in the evening, having hair that's messy because you just washed your face and that's why the ends are damp while the rest of your head is dry.
This is called being plain retarded.I'd tag Shu Lin my best-friend-cum-wife if she had a blog but NOOOO SHE DOESN'T. So I tag:
1) Amy
2) Sarah SC
3) Darren
4) Priscilla
5) Sara Loh
Tagged after reading Yench's blog. Go visit it, he's an amazing writer.
1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 or more friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got it from.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Amazing- Aerosmith
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
The Happy Happy Birthday Song- The Arrogant Worms
Happy birthday!
You did not accomplish much
But you didn't die this year
I guess that's good enough
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
For Now- Avenue Q
For now we're healthy.
For now we're employed.
For now we're happy...
If not overjoyed.
And we'll accept the things we cannot avoid, for now...
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Why You'd Want to Live Here- Death Cab for Cutie (To move to LA and get disillusioned?)
And I can't see why you'd want to live here.
Billboards reach past the tallest buildings,
"We are not perfect - but we sure try."
As UV rays "degraded" our youth with time.
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
She's Got Issues- The Offspring (Oh thank you)
I'm seeing this girl and she just might be out of her mind
Well she's got baggage and it's all the emotional kind
She talks about closure and that validation bit
I don't mean to be insensitive, but I really hate that shit
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Heroes- David Cook (HAH. I LIKE.)
All these heroes come and go
But you're still standing
You teach me to rise up
To open my eyes up
All these heroes come and go
But you're still standing
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Photobooth - Death Cab for Cutie (HUH?!)
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Bring Your Daughter to the Slaughter- Iron Maiden (Whose daughter is the question)
WHAT IS 2+2?
Link- L'Arc~en~Ciel (awesome band, awesome song)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Since U Been Gone (Which best friend is this? LOL can't be Shu Lin D:)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
We Looked Like Giants- Death Cab for Cutie (no comment)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Death of an Interior Decorator- Death Cab for Cutie (WhatthehellLOL. Why so much Death Cab though?)
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! - Mamma Mia!Cast (A desperate housewife. I think not)
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Had Enough- Breaking Benjamin (Considering I've had enough with men, this is apt)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Cliff Diving- +44 (Yeah, this is pretty true- they think I'm a nutter that's going to risk it all to write)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
It's a Long Way to the Top- School of Rock
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Disconnect the Dots- Of Montreal (creepy. I like)
Come disconnect the dots with me, poppet
Come disconnect the dots
Come disconnect the dots with me, poppet
Come disconnect the dots
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Damn Regret- Red Jumpsuit Apparatus (there was another Death Cab song but I HAVE HAD ENOUGH DEATH CAB. I don't even like them THAT much. Anyway, I don't like regrets, I don't have regrets. So what is this supposed to mean?)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Mix Tape- Avenue Q (So true!)
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
A Rush of Blood to the Head- Coldplay
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Vindicated- Dashboard Confessional (Nice.)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
The Name of the Game- Amanda Seyfried
By the way guys: I LOST. XD
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
One More Night- Stars
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Pretty Fly for a White Guy- The Offspring (Posers and wannabes? This should have been the answer to the one above, and the one above should be the answer to this)
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Bad Things- Jave Everett (This does not bode well for my future does it?)
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Girlfriend- Avril Lavigne (BOYFRIEND-STEALERS... When there's no boyfriend to steal)
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
HOWLING- abingdon boys school
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Title & Registration- Death Cab for Cutie (ANOTHER ONE?!)
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Underclass Hero- Sum 41
And now I'm desensitized (I state my place in nowhere)
Burning the flag (Of the degeneration)
Everyone sing (The anthem of no future)
Down with the mass ('Cause we're not listening)
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Behind these Hazel Eyes- Kelly Clarkson
Tags:
1) DARREN (see Jas I tagged him FIRST)
2) Rachel
3) Valerie
4) Kits
5) Hai Sherng
6) Sarah SC
7) Xiao Tian
8) Jing Min
9) Pin
10) Xiang Xiang
AND JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO MAKE HER DO THIS BECAUSE I'M EVIL: AMY. MUAHAHA!
1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 or more friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got it from.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Amazing- Aerosmith
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
The Happy Happy Birthday Song- The Arrogant Worms
Happy birthday!
You did not accomplish much
But you didn't die this year
I guess that's good enough
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
For Now- Avenue Q
For now we're healthy.
For now we're employed.
For now we're happy...
If not overjoyed.
And we'll accept the things we cannot avoid, for now...
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Why You'd Want to Live Here- Death Cab for Cutie (To move to LA and get disillusioned?)
And I can't see why you'd want to live here.
Billboards reach past the tallest buildings,
"We are not perfect - but we sure try."
As UV rays "degraded" our youth with time.
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
She's Got Issues- The Offspring (Oh thank you)
I'm seeing this girl and she just might be out of her mind
Well she's got baggage and it's all the emotional kind
She talks about closure and that validation bit
I don't mean to be insensitive, but I really hate that shit
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Heroes- David Cook (HAH. I LIKE.)
All these heroes come and go
But you're still standing
You teach me to rise up
To open my eyes up
All these heroes come and go
But you're still standing
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Photobooth - Death Cab for Cutie (HUH?!)
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Bring Your Daughter to the Slaughter- Iron Maiden (Whose daughter is the question)
WHAT IS 2+2?
Link- L'Arc~en~Ciel (awesome band, awesome song)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Since U Been Gone (Which best friend is this? LOL can't be Shu Lin D:)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
We Looked Like Giants- Death Cab for Cutie (no comment)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Death of an Interior Decorator- Death Cab for Cutie (WhatthehellLOL. Why so much Death Cab though?)
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! - Mamma Mia!Cast (A desperate housewife. I think not)
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Had Enough- Breaking Benjamin (Considering I've had enough with men, this is apt)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Cliff Diving- +44 (Yeah, this is pretty true- they think I'm a nutter that's going to risk it all to write)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
It's a Long Way to the Top- School of Rock
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Disconnect the Dots- Of Montreal (creepy. I like)
Come disconnect the dots with me, poppet
Come disconnect the dots
Come disconnect the dots with me, poppet
Come disconnect the dots
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Damn Regret- Red Jumpsuit Apparatus (there was another Death Cab song but I HAVE HAD ENOUGH DEATH CAB. I don't even like them THAT much. Anyway, I don't like regrets, I don't have regrets. So what is this supposed to mean?)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Mix Tape- Avenue Q (So true!)
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
A Rush of Blood to the Head- Coldplay
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Vindicated- Dashboard Confessional (Nice.)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
The Name of the Game- Amanda Seyfried
By the way guys: I LOST. XD
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
One More Night- Stars
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Pretty Fly for a White Guy- The Offspring (Posers and wannabes? This should have been the answer to the one above, and the one above should be the answer to this)
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Bad Things- Jave Everett (This does not bode well for my future does it?)
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Girlfriend- Avril Lavigne (BOYFRIEND-STEALERS... When there's no boyfriend to steal)
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
HOWLING- abingdon boys school
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Title & Registration- Death Cab for Cutie (ANOTHER ONE?!)
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Underclass Hero- Sum 41
And now I'm desensitized (I state my place in nowhere)
Burning the flag (Of the degeneration)
Everyone sing (The anthem of no future)
Down with the mass ('Cause we're not listening)
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Behind these Hazel Eyes- Kelly Clarkson
Tags:
1) DARREN (see Jas I tagged him FIRST)
2) Rachel
3) Valerie
4) Kits
5) Hai Sherng
6) Sarah SC
7) Xiao Tian
8) Jing Min
9) Pin
10) Xiang Xiang
AND JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO MAKE HER DO THIS BECAUSE I'M EVIL: AMY. MUAHAHA!
Since I'm in a taggy mood, I shall do the tag I wasn't planning to do: from HS.
1. Does it matter to you if your boyfriend or girlfriend smokes?
I'd pummel him. HAH.
2. How about drinking?
Nah I'm cool with that.
3. Do you liked someone you can't have?
Check your grammar, question. Decide whether you're in the past or present tense and I'll tell you my answer.
4. If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
Yes? I mean I'd rather know.
5. What's your favourite sport?
Sleeping.
6. It's saturday night, you're home alone, what do you do?
Phone someone up.
7. Do you like roller coasters?
Heck yes!
8. When's the perfect time to have a bf/gf?
When the time's right.
9. If you could date any celebrity, who would it be?
David Cook :D
10. What are you doing this weekend?
Cousin's birthday party!
11. What is your favourite restaurant?
Anywhere Japanese.
12. Have you ever hugged someone?
POINTLESS QUESTION.
13. Ever kissed someone you weren't attracted to?
No.
14. Do you like anyone right now?
A lot of people, why?
15. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
THEIR HEIGHT. XD
16. Which do you prefer, Beach or Mountains?
"Wherever. It's whoever that counts!" - HS
17. What kind of phone do you have?
Dead phone.
18. Computer or Laptop?
Orange Macbook.
19. Jeans or sweats?
Jeans.
20. Which year(s) has/have been the best so far?
Last year and 2005.
21. How old are you gonna be on your next birthday?
18.
22. What should you be doing right now?
Studying.
23. What is your favourite TV show?
No idea. Don't watch a lot of TV.
24. What's been your last purchase?
Wan Tan Mee!!
25. Are you attracted to girls/boys that smoke?
... This is pointless.
26. Have you ever fallen on your butt in front of a crowd of people?
Very pointless. (Yes)
27. What do you do when you're at home?
STOP ASKING RETARDED QUESTIONS
28. What is your favourite subject?
ISN'T IT OBVIOUS
29. What's the best thing that happened to you?
The fact that this tag is done because it is so pointless.
1. Does it matter to you if your boyfriend or girlfriend smokes?
I'd pummel him. HAH.
2. How about drinking?
Nah I'm cool with that.
3. Do you liked someone you can't have?
Check your grammar, question. Decide whether you're in the past or present tense and I'll tell you my answer.
4. If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
Yes? I mean I'd rather know.
5. What's your favourite sport?
Sleeping.
6. It's saturday night, you're home alone, what do you do?
Phone someone up.
7. Do you like roller coasters?
Heck yes!
8. When's the perfect time to have a bf/gf?
When the time's right.
9. If you could date any celebrity, who would it be?
David Cook :D
10. What are you doing this weekend?
Cousin's birthday party!
11. What is your favourite restaurant?
Anywhere Japanese.
12. Have you ever hugged someone?
POINTLESS QUESTION.
13. Ever kissed someone you weren't attracted to?
No.
14. Do you like anyone right now?
A lot of people, why?
15. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
THEIR HEIGHT. XD
16. Which do you prefer, Beach or Mountains?
"Wherever. It's whoever that counts!" - HS
17. What kind of phone do you have?
Dead phone.
18. Computer or Laptop?
Orange Macbook.
19. Jeans or sweats?
Jeans.
20. Which year(s) has/have been the best so far?
Last year and 2005.
21. How old are you gonna be on your next birthday?
18.
22. What should you be doing right now?
Studying.
23. What is your favourite TV show?
No idea. Don't watch a lot of TV.
24. What's been your last purchase?
Wan Tan Mee!!
25. Are you attracted to girls/boys that smoke?
... This is pointless.
26. Have you ever fallen on your butt in front of a crowd of people?
Very pointless. (Yes)
27. What do you do when you're at home?
STOP ASKING RETARDED QUESTIONS
28. What is your favourite subject?
ISN'T IT OBVIOUS
29. What's the best thing that happened to you?
The fact that this tag is done because it is so pointless.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Instead of reading up stuff on A Doll's House like I should have, I ended up blog-hopping and found a blog of a girl that I wasn't exactly on good terms with from my old school. Let's call her YM. I won't post a link to her blog over here because, well, it's in Mandarin which most of you won't understand, but still.
It was rather odd. I started reading through her posts, some of them written just after the time where she was being a bitch to me, and some of them more recent. She writes well. I have to give her that, though it's hard to deny that I'm better (coughNARCISSISMcough)
ohfinenotreally [[seehowiLIEDtomakemefeelbetter]]?
I'm still kind of speechless as to what to say. Will blog about this some time later, when I don't have quotations to memorize and better things to do.
I need to go back to writing decent prose.
It was rather odd. I started reading through her posts, some of them written just after the time where she was being a bitch to me, and some of them more recent. She writes well. I have to give her that, though it's hard to deny that I'm better (coughNARCISSISMcough)
ohfinenotreally [[seehowiLIEDtomakemefeelbetter]]?
I'm still kind of speechless as to what to say. Will blog about this some time later, when I don't have quotations to memorize and better things to do.
I need to go back to writing decent prose.
Wrap hope round my neck
Conceal my eyes with wishes and
Bury my soul in dreams
s.o.m.e.t.i.m.e.s. {{too much}} still isn't enough.
--------------------------
On another note, Math was so bad it was funny. KS found it difficult. And I'm talking about the Math-Olympiad winning math genius KS here. At least Sarah found it okay but I think she's the only one. After a while I got bored and started trying not to get a good grade but to get enough marks so that I could get a 5. (this is, of course, before I found out our not-so-lovely portfolios would be included in our final grade. Which I am happy for)
Varoot applied the same strategy. Oh great I'm now thinking like VAROOT. Shows how desperate I've become... Kidding, kidding. But seriously, even people like Mri skipped almost whole questions and as for poor souls like me, all I could do was bash my head repeatedly against the table while screaming WHYYY. WHYYYY.
Not out loud, of course. Mentally. I can so imagine Mr. Webster mocking us as he set the paper. -.-
Oh well. All in the past. Mm? Now I'm searching for stuff on A Doll's House and hoping I'll get a good grade tomorrow.
English SHOULD be okay, if I work all of tonight and this afternoon.
IF.
Conceal my eyes with wishes and
Bury my soul in dreams
s.o.m.e.t.i.m.e.s. {{too much}} still isn't enough.
--------------------------
On another note, Math was so bad it was funny. KS found it difficult. And I'm talking about the Math-Olympiad winning math genius KS here. At least Sarah found it okay but I think she's the only one. After a while I got bored and started trying not to get a good grade but to get enough marks so that I could get a 5. (this is, of course, before I found out our not-so-lovely portfolios would be included in our final grade. Which I am happy for)
Varoot applied the same strategy. Oh great I'm now thinking like VAROOT. Shows how desperate I've become... Kidding, kidding. But seriously, even people like Mri skipped almost whole questions and as for poor souls like me, all I could do was bash my head repeatedly against the table while screaming WHYYY. WHYYYY.
Not out loud, of course. Mentally. I can so imagine Mr. Webster mocking us as he set the paper. -.-
Oh well. All in the past. Mm? Now I'm searching for stuff on A Doll's House and hoping I'll get a good grade tomorrow.
English SHOULD be okay, if I work all of tonight and this afternoon.
IF.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
My vanity at having a new blogskin is making me addicted to blogging again- not that that's a bad thing, but it is when I've got an exam tomorrow which I am almost definitely screwed for, but I honestly don't really care about soil. Apparently, in place of the soil module of environmental chemistry, they used to learn about how much poison could kill someone. I think that would have been the preferable alternative to... well... soil. Soil.
Sigh. I don't like soil. Why in the world would I ever need to know that cation exchange capacity is the extent to which the soil can give the roots of a plant cations and minerals that the plant might need? (Ooh, I did that from memory. Niceee.)
On a happier note, because of the nostalgia felt at listening to Kireida, I went back into my hard disk for my old computer and dug up a whole load of songs that I used to listen to- both Japanese and English, and one or two Chinese too- so I could open them on iTunes to listen to. I'm currently listening to an old favourite by Lead; more memories for me from that band, I used to love their lead singer because he was adorable. But I digress. Listening to all these songs reminds me of old laughs. Old jokes. Times long gone,
And the girl I used to be.
(P.S: Is it just me or do I look marginally better now?)
Sigh. I don't like soil. Why in the world would I ever need to know that cation exchange capacity is the extent to which the soil can give the roots of a plant cations and minerals that the plant might need? (Ooh, I did that from memory. Niceee.)
On a happier note, because of the nostalgia felt at listening to Kireida, I went back into my hard disk for my old computer and dug up a whole load of songs that I used to listen to- both Japanese and English, and one or two Chinese too- so I could open them on iTunes to listen to. I'm currently listening to an old favourite by Lead; more memories for me from that band, I used to love their lead singer because he was adorable. But I digress. Listening to all these songs reminds me of old laughs. Old jokes. Times long gone,
And the girl I used to be.(P.S: Is it just me or do I look marginally better now?)
Saturday, January 10, 2009
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4-Dgg1Jjkw
I went to Napat's blog today, and heard this song playing in the background. For old times' sake, I went and dug up the video on Youtube to watch, even though I never watched it when I was younger. I'd listen to the songs but I didn't watch videos, except for that one stupid one that Pin made me watch together when we were in my place. It was funny, but not funny enough to make me want to watch the rest.
But I LIKE w-inds. I really do, even though I haven't listened to any of their music in a while. Watch the video. They're good dancers. He's cute. He has a good voice. They're somewhat random and funny. Generic Japanese boy band stuff, not really my kind of thing these days. But I like it. It makes me smile. It makes me refresh her blog over and over again just so I can listen to the song, because I didn't think of loading it onto my computer. It reminds me of times long gone, people long gone.
Things that are drifting far away.
(Jianing I'll miss you. Have fun in Canada. I'll always be your Kanda as long as you promise to be my Allen...)
(Even when I meet the girl-catching, Gaiman-reading bookstore guy.)
I went to Napat's blog today, and heard this song playing in the background. For old times' sake, I went and dug up the video on Youtube to watch, even though I never watched it when I was younger. I'd listen to the songs but I didn't watch videos, except for that one stupid one that Pin made me watch together when we were in my place. It was funny, but not funny enough to make me want to watch the rest.
But I LIKE w-inds. I really do, even though I haven't listened to any of their music in a while. Watch the video. They're good dancers. He's cute. He has a good voice. They're somewhat random and funny. Generic Japanese boy band stuff, not really my kind of thing these days. But I like it. It makes me smile. It makes me refresh her blog over and over again just so I can listen to the song, because I didn't think of loading it onto my computer. It reminds me of times long gone, people long gone.
Things that are drifting far away.
(Jianing I'll miss you. Have fun in Canada. I'll always be your Kanda as long as you promise to be my Allen...)
(Even when I meet the girl-catching, Gaiman-reading bookstore guy.)
You know-
I can kind of see why Mr. Walton would call Sarah and me grade-obsessed;; her because she works so hard and deserves to do well, me just because I'm greedy and expect to do well without studying as much as her. But hey, I call it a consequence of being in the Malaysian system for too long. When you're somewhere like this, things- and people- and life- start screwing with your head. I think I need to calm down, listen to some good music, take a breather, and laugh.
Or go drink some more coffee and risk looking absolutely dead in the morning. Fun stuff- and then troop into the exam hall half dead on Monday when I have Chemistry and Math- the two best subjects for me, NOT,even though I love Chem and everything ((but I'm not good at it anymore)).
As for Math, I think you all know what I think of the subject... It's become very obvious, especially from the various complaints I've written about it and the way I poke fun at it. But seriously. "When am I ever going to walk into a market and ask for x fish and y tomatoes?""
{{I got that from my first day of Uplands, when I was talking to Pin in Mr. Edward's class. If only Math could go back to being that easy. }}
And guys, link me if you haven't done so already, because I've removed most emo posts and I want to show this lovely blogskin off.
Or go drink some more coffee and risk looking absolutely dead in the morning. Fun stuff- and then troop into the exam hall half dead on Monday when I have Chemistry and Math- the two best subjects for me, NOT,
As for Math, I think you all know what I think of the subject... It's become very obvious, especially from the various complaints I've written about it and the way I poke fun at it. But seriously. "When am I ever going to walk into a market and ask for x fish and y tomatoes?""
{{I got that from my first day of Uplands, when I was talking to Pin in Mr. Edward's class. If only Math could go back to being that easy. }}
And guys, link me if you haven't done so already, because I've removed most emo posts and I want to show this lovely blogskin off.
As you might have noticed;;
This blog's got a new skin, and it's not private anymore.
That's because I think I need a separate private outlet for my own eyes- anyway I don't think I have that much to hide any more. Do I?
Besides, now my obnoxious opinionated opinions are hanging in cyberspace for everyone to see. (:
Cheers, and enjoy your stay.
That's because I think I need a separate private outlet for my own eyes- anyway I don't think I have that much to hide any more. Do I?
Besides, now my obnoxious opinionated opinions are hanging in cyberspace for everyone to see. (:
Cheers, and enjoy your stay.
Until I figure out how to change the text so that it can be seen, highlight to read.
WHY AM I NOT ORANGE?
#FF1493 |
Your dominant hues are red and magenta. You love doing your own thing and going on your own adventures, but there are close friends you know you just can't leave behind. You can influence others on days when you're patient, but most times you just want to go out, have fun, and do your own thing. Your saturation level is high - you get into life and have a strong personality. Everyone you meet will either love you or hate you - either way, your goal is to get them to change the world with you. You are very hard working and don't have much patience for people without your initiative. Your outlook on life is very bright. You are sunny and optimistic about life and others find it very encouraging, but remember to tone it down if you sense irritation. |
WHY AM I NOT ORANGE?
Thursday, January 8, 2009
So I've pretty much gotten over my rejection (the fact that I've beat 16 other people to get my place in King's helped a lot, haha.) Anyway I decided to do some more research on it, and wow. It seems like my kind of place. Historical city setting, and the best part is that my campus will be smack in the middle of the Strand, which means shopping at Covent Garden, great facilities and ultimate prettiness of everything, I swear, the place is lovely, but best of all... IMMEDIATE ACCESS TO WEST END THEATRES. MUSICALS, DRAMAS. HERE I COMEEE!!!
HOWEVER. One con about acoomodation. I was hoping to get to a student corridor or something, you know, typical student life and blah blah blah. So I was flipping through the undergraduate accomodations prospectus to see what it would be like, until I found out something when I read in closer detail:
The. Bathrooms. Are. Mixed.
Cue spazzing and screaming that my purity is going to go down the drain because my EYES! MY VIRGIN EYESSS, everything I once knew is going to crash down upon MEEEEEEE. So I imagined several scenarios, in order of most likely to least likely:
Scenario 1:
*Wei Yun walks in onto a guy*
WY: LOLWTF
Scenario 2:
*Someone walks in on WY*
WY: asodfds;f;ds;f;;; MY PURITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH NO I HAVE SHAMED MY MOTHER MY FATHER MY ANCESTORS MY UNCLES MY AUNTS AND EVERYHTING I HAVE EVER KNOWN OH GOD WHYY WHY MEEEEE
Scenario 3:
*WY walks in on a couple making sweet love in the bathroom*
*WY dies*
Scenario 4:
*WY and hawt boyfriend are (dum dum dum)*
*Person is blinded*
... I guess I COULD stay in flat residences right? Only those aren't catered, and I know I should do my own cooking and all, but still. I'd rather have the normal dorm life where I get to run around knocking on peoples' doors and talking to them and laughing with them instead of being holed up in a room and having to go up and down stairs... It just wouldn't be the same would it? And I know Cambridge was like that, but hey, it's Cambridge, and since I didn't get in might as well experience dorm life to the max since... I don't know lah.
It worries me, actually, the fact that bathrooms are mixed, English guys are supposed to be hawt I know but I STILL DON'T WANT TO WALK INTO ONE OF THEM NEKKID OR SOMETHING. I DON'T. AND WORSE STILL I DON'T WANT TO BE WALKED IN UPON BECAUSE MY FATNESS WOULD CAUSE AN EPIDEMIC OF BLINDNESS AND EVERYONE WOULD DIE UPON SEEING ME.
Urrgh. I don't know. Freaky thing is Pin and I were just talking about this a few days ago and I was commenting how thankful I was that I wasn't going to the US where they have mixed bathrooms and laughing at her, and that how weird it would be if my period started dripping and someone saw and DO THEY EVEN HAVE CUBICLES IN THE KCL BATHROOMS, THEY HAD BETTER OR I WILL DROWN MYSELFFF IN THE TOILET BOWL only people would see me drowing myself wouldn't they and they'd laugh at me BECAUSE OF THE LACK OF PRIVACY
I swear, karma has come and bitten me in the butt. I swear. It has. WESTERN COUNTRIES AND THEIR MIXED BATHROOMS WHYYY
HOWEVER. One con about acoomodation. I was hoping to get to a student corridor or something, you know, typical student life and blah blah blah. So I was flipping through the undergraduate accomodations prospectus to see what it would be like, until I found out something when I read in closer detail:
The. Bathrooms. Are. Mixed.
Cue spazzing and screaming that my purity is going to go down the drain because my EYES! MY VIRGIN EYESSS, everything I once knew is going to crash down upon MEEEEEEE. So I imagined several scenarios, in order of most likely to least likely:
Scenario 1:
*Wei Yun walks in onto a guy*
WY: LOLWTF
Scenario 2:
*Someone walks in on WY*
WY: asodfds;f;ds;f;;; MY PURITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH NO I HAVE SHAMED MY MOTHER MY FATHER MY ANCESTORS MY UNCLES MY AUNTS AND EVERYHTING I HAVE EVER KNOWN OH GOD WHYY WHY MEEEEE
Scenario 3:
*WY walks in on a couple making sweet love in the bathroom*
*WY dies*
Scenario 4:
*WY and hawt boyfriend are (dum dum dum)*
*Person is blinded*
... I guess I COULD stay in flat residences right? Only those aren't catered, and I know I should do my own cooking and all, but still. I'd rather have the normal dorm life where I get to run around knocking on peoples' doors and talking to them and laughing with them instead of being holed up in a room and having to go up and down stairs... It just wouldn't be the same would it? And I know Cambridge was like that, but hey, it's Cambridge, and since I didn't get in might as well experience dorm life to the max since... I don't know lah.
It worries me, actually, the fact that bathrooms are mixed, English guys are supposed to be hawt I know but I STILL DON'T WANT TO WALK INTO ONE OF THEM NEKKID OR SOMETHING. I DON'T. AND WORSE STILL I DON'T WANT TO BE WALKED IN UPON BECAUSE MY FATNESS WOULD CAUSE AN EPIDEMIC OF BLINDNESS AND EVERYONE WOULD DIE UPON SEEING ME.
Urrgh. I don't know. Freaky thing is Pin and I were just talking about this a few days ago and I was commenting how thankful I was that I wasn't going to the US where they have mixed bathrooms and laughing at her, and that how weird it would be if my period started dripping and someone saw and DO THEY EVEN HAVE CUBICLES IN THE KCL BATHROOMS, THEY HAD BETTER OR I WILL DROWN MYSELFFF IN THE TOILET BOWL only people would see me drowing myself wouldn't they and they'd laugh at me BECAUSE OF THE LACK OF PRIVACY
I swear, karma has come and bitten me in the butt. I swear. It has. WESTERN COUNTRIES AND THEIR MIXED BATHROOMS WHYYY
Monday, January 5, 2009
Immediate goals:
1) Get good grades in my mocks
2) Laugh about the fact that I didn't get in- hey, it's kinda funny
3) Give Ning the best possible send-off
Short-term goals:
1) Get at least 38 in the IB so that I can reach my conditional offer for King's OR New South Wales
2) Finish my novel, or at least a first draft
3) Get half the things on my birthday wishlist done
4) Cosfest 2009!
Long-term goals:
1) Become a successful author
2) Do a Masters in Journalism in Cambridge (?)
3) Be a good person
Q: Are you okay?
A: I'm okay, and I don't want sympathy or anything like that. All I want from you guys is your friendship, some laughs, and a lot of money.
1) Get good grades in my mocks
2) Laugh about the fact that I didn't get in- hey, it's kinda funny
3) Give Ning the best possible send-off
Short-term goals:
1) Get at least 38 in the IB so that I can reach my conditional offer for King's OR New South Wales
2) Finish my novel, or at least a first draft
3) Get half the things on my birthday wishlist done
4) Cosfest 2009!
Long-term goals:
1) Become a successful author
2) Do a Masters in Journalism in Cambridge (?)
3) Be a good person
Q: Are you okay?
A: I'm okay, and I don't want sympathy or anything like that. All I want from you guys is your friendship, some laughs, and a lot of money.
I dreamed that I got rejected.
Now, we shall apply the same logic to this that we have to my other dreams. For the IOC, I dreamed that I would get a certain chapter (but proceed to totally mess it up). In reality, Eveline got that chapter, and she did not mess it up.
Therefore, that means...
Someone else will get a rejection? (Preferably someone on the other side of the world)
Or...
I will get a rejection, but not in the form of a letter. Possibly an e-mail? A phone call? I don't know.
I don't know if I want to know.
Now, we shall apply the same logic to this that we have to my other dreams. For the IOC, I dreamed that I would get a certain chapter (but proceed to totally mess it up). In reality, Eveline got that chapter, and she did not mess it up.
Therefore, that means...
Someone else will get a rejection? (Preferably someone on the other side of the world)
Or...
I will get a rejection, but not in the form of a letter. Possibly an e-mail? A phone call? I don't know.
I don't know if I want to know.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Saturday, January 3, 2009
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